Congratulations B. JOY ….

I thought I was watching a Season 4 Episode! You know Semi Good- Semi SUCKASS!!!

While this episode was hilarious and jokey, I was pissed with all that PeytWhore shit! Yet, all those pot shots at her Made it Great though- Hip, Hip Hooray! And Yes, PEYTON IS DEB- Dixon, SCOREEEEEEEEE! Clearly, somebody knows the truth, to bad its B. Joy and not The Douche Bag Writing Team…

& What exactly makes PeytWHORE believe that the nuisance that is Mia can read A picture book let along Italian just because she is Italian. I’m Half Italian and though I speak it rather fluently, I’m not the best at reading/writing it. And I hope that Andy & Karen are living in Italy because otherwise that made no sense.

And The Whiney Whore cries so much… cry, cry, cry… I knew this pregnancy was going to suck! The Hormones turn EMO into PSYCHO… Damn, stop being a whining bitch and tell Lucas to help your ass! You didn’t make the spawn alone! Damn, then of course Mr. Douche shows up, hear baby heart beat… cue car running over stupid ass douche!

But Back to Dixon- Hell yeah, like a Chris Keller on Speed! TOCAN SAM-I was Laughing My Ass off! I really wish he and Julian would just crack on the annoying douche that is Lucas! Damn, he makes me sick! For real, can’t wait for him to disappear off the show! Him and EMO cry Nag, Nag, Nag! Damn, disappear please! Too much Pucas B.Joy, too much Pucas!

Actually, I am so tired of all this Peyton… & what’s with the Brooke’s a Whore shit being thrown out! Now that already got rid of Brucas but they can’t destroy the fact that Brooke was still a good person most of high school! And JULIAN… What the fuck, are they trying to make him unlikable! Everybody is basically calling Brooke a whore, but why not Peyton who loved everybody, Nathan, LucASS… the biggest WHORE this side of LIL KIM!

That PISSED ME OFF! Why the hell would they do that! MARK AND COMPANY CAN KISS MY ASS because you know what, a lot of people like the character because they can identify with it. Even as a guy, My dad though he could by me off and I partied all through high school, so when I started watching this fucked up show, I was like- yeah, I understand that chick! But now the moral of the story is what?

YOU CAN BE a douche in high school, but CAN NEVER LIVE IT DOWN, CAN NEVER PROVE PEOPLE WRONG! Is this a joke…? I don’t like watching shows that make me feel like shit! And this shit does, there is no moral, no fricken good things happen!

Of course, Julian made up for it in the END! Still I like Brucas, though LucASS is making it so hard to like him! He didn’t even care that Brooke confronted him about the script saying she only liked: sex, Sex, Sex! Not cool, he could have pretended, but with the way he did Fergie, I’ m not surprised. The dude stuck with him through thick and thin, yet he can’t give hi a small role in the movie… Loser ass, stuck up son of a bitch! I HATE LUCAS, the corpse boring ass, Scott!

But then right back to the PuKable PUCAS together! What do you get when you Put a whining Ghost, butter face and a Dickwad= PUCAS! UGH! Though Seeing that troll did give us Skillz, again B. Joy Bravo… & Haley not a PROP! IS this the Twilight Zone! I like the storyline of maybe being fired and not solving the problem in one episode! DAMN, the mix of humor and angst was good! I even enjoyed Sam and Haley, but some Baley would have been better!

And Nate’s storyline is SO FUCKIN GOOD! Damn I was into this so much! Finally some sports for people like me who are ready to see some real action! Not random tosses through walls & Shit, but Basketball drama! I felt bad for the guy who Nathan basically got fired by he had it coming! I really don’t want Nathan to quit or anything, because this is reality. I\it’s like, and you have to work hard and you can’t be Mr. Nice guy!

THE JAMIE & DAN… Call me a SOFT, but I wanted to cry like a little baby! Thank GOD we get to see more Dan, but seriously needs to be the bad guy, he plays it so well. I like the dynamic of Jamie and Dan on the Date with the teacher, and when Jamie told the teacher that Dan had been in jail, I laughed so loud!

Finally our j Luke is behaving like a 5 year old! That was the best!
But what next week, back to boring PUCAS VILLE!
Hidden scene from next week…

Titled:
PUCABLE
Typical Pucas Conversation/Scene:

Peyton walks in wearing a dress that reveals the body transplant she had with Michael Jackson, “Hello Lucas, have fun squinting all day?”
Lucas, While squinting, livens up a bit. “ Brook- I mean Pretty Gir- I mean Lindsey… Oh hell, which one are you?”

“The stalker! You know, follows you everywhere!” Peyton’s eyes droop as usual while mouth hangs open and a fly swoops in. The smell of shit from licking said Blonde man-whore’s mouth is too irresistible, “Defaces public property but manages not to go to jail. Leader of the Break Brooke’s Heart Club. The only person that would take you back and would never leave no matter how much you whine like a bitch and treat me like pond scum!”

Lucas attempts a Julian Grin while wearing horrible jacket but fails miserably. Instead the douche bag looks like a wet dog who just got neutered. Defeated, he yawns while squinting. “Oh, that one! I forgot which one you were between scratching my balls, not trying to get a job, thinking of ways to save people without having to get too close and have them notice the lipstick I’m wearing.”

Peyton scowls, “Luke, you don’t want everyone to know that you’ve lost all your manhood when you turned into Tree Hills resident Trick.” Chin meets with bone also called a hand, and almost starts a forest fire, “Hey, that is so ironic since You gave me Tric because you’re so dumb you couldn’t run a marathon even if Psycho Derek were chasing you with a knife.”

“Psycho Derek?” Lucas drawls in confusion, “Is that my producer Julian or Dixon/ Dawson! If it is, I need to talk to Brooke and get some advice from her. You know that whenever I start to actually turn into a corpse and ratings fall, they bring me to Brooke to get my pulse racing.”

Random Brucaser: Dude That’s what We’ve been trying to tell everybody!
Random Puker: GET OVER IT!
Brucaser: But Dude, that Lucas GUY just said it, too!
Puker: GET OVER IT!
Brucaser: Are those the only words you know? I mean, if I ask another question what will you say?
Puker: GET OVER IT!
Brucaser: Okay. I’ll test my theory. How Much wood would a Woodchuck Chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Puker: GET OVER IT *Glitch in Robot programming from Boring Pucas couple* GGGGG-Get overrrrr ITTTTT!
Brucaser smiles to self… oh yes, easily influenced Pucas fan ALERT. Snickering, the Brucaser sets out on a plan to Prove that the Puker/Leytoner agrees that Pucas sucks…. All that is necessary to do is say a couple of sentences and watch the Puker reply.
Brucaser: Your couple sucks donkey’s nuts, bores the Energizer Bunny into a coma, looks like Incest with a Grandfather & A corpse. Everybody hates them but a few, so you need to build a bridge and-
Puker: GET OVER IT!
Brucaser: Ha-ha-ha! I knew you’d agree! LOSER!
Puker while reading this blog: It’s only a show… *cries* Wah, Wah! You disgust me…
Brucaser: Yes, It is Just a Show, Loser! But why if you are so disgusted do you even go out of my way to read and reply! But you Know What wise men say, “PUCAS is, as STUPID Does!” LOSER! And now that I know it strikes your soul so much and offends you, I must continue to be even harsher! MUHAHA!
Puker runs off and Brucaser follows to taunt more!

Peyton’s mouth finally snaps open, “ What about MEEEEEEEEE! MEEEEE! YOU & ME!!! ME & THE DEVIL Spawn… we should name it Seyton by the way! Seyton as in Spawn of Peyton! Then we can fall asleep while taking care of it and hope that Dead nanny Carrie doesn’t walk in the unlocked front door and kill everyone.”

Lucas shakes his head, “Nanny Carrie’s Dead? Since when? I didn’t even get a chance to profess my undying love to her, and Nathan got a kiss! This just will not suffice! We all know that Nathan never gets his dreams while I get everything! Damn Mark! I’m not coming back for season seven! And where is my prop, Haley! She should run in and say-”

On cue Haley runs in with Pom-Poms, “Oh God ship LucAss the town slut and Tranny manny PeytWh*re I bow to your benevolence!” Bows then stands, “Nanny Carrie is Psycho Derek’s ex-girlfriend that he thought was dead. She almost killed me and Jamie.”

Haley starts to cry at the thought but LucASS interrupts her.
“Excuse me!” Lucas yawns and squints while staring at Peyton then shifting to Haley, “Um, prop… You can make like a banana and split now. Unless you want to talk about how good I am at loving people. And by the way, if Jamie could please send me his Hooked on Phonics workbook, that would be nice. I’m having a hard t…t…”

Everyone pauses while Lucas stares towards the cue card and struggles to read it. Dork ASShole gets off directors chair and walks onto set. “I’m going to be Max in this scene! This is the scene where Peyton gets Molested at the dentist office while asleep.”

“Another storyline about just Peyton!” Haley screams, but Lucas shouts, “Score! I don’t have to be in that scene do I! It’s enough that I can’t act, but doing love scenes with a troll. She refuses to wear that paper bag I bought for her. Man, Why doesn’t Brooke like me again.”

Max/ Dork stares at Peyton, “Because I couldn’t come up with a plausible reason to break you up & watch Peyton have a sex scene while masturbating and pretending to be in your body. So it had to happen, not to mention,” Mark mumbles, “ParissssssssssHillltonmmmhn mummbly mum.”

And Scene!

That was mean, but I’m bored and it’s a joke out of pure spite… But Whatever.

As for CMM and his supposed leaving; NONONONONONONONONONO!

THERE IS ONLY ONE REASON TO KEEP LUCAS ALIVE…
Keep THAT Droopy faced EMO bitch ass whore away from my Brulian! I don’t want that saggy faced mule anywhere near OTH’s new Golden couple! NOW I do like BRULIAN since LucASS Has caught the Chronic STD known as PeytWhore-itis! And Honestly, the bimbo serves no purpose in this show except to lick Lucas’ ASScrack and invade Brooke’s relationships. Drama Vampiress also know as SEYTON!

She sucks the life out of trees with all the whining and interloping she does. I bet The Mercy Killer Doctor Kevorkian used Peyton’s scenes to get those people to willingly commit suicide. No offense to the actress in real life, but that chicks acting is like the Corpse actor that is Chad Michael Murray on Speed! Two of the most boring people to ever grace a television screen since my Grandparents made a sex tape (SERIOUSLY EWWWWWWWWWW!)!

Much Love Homies,
Todd-dizzle!